Frozen

By Mac Guerreiro Eye’m so sad today,There are no other words,Even now eye am my own worst judge,Even now that eye understand,How never knowing safety formed the land,My heart,My mind,My nervous system,All operating as victims,Eye know it it,Eye see it,Eye work at it day by day,Sometimes it just feels overwhelming,Most times,Actually.

Two-Way

By Mac Guerreiro Eye’ve never been great at receiving,At opening my lane on that two-way street,Receiving love especially,Eye’ve always felt as if my feelings weren’t real,Because that’s what those outside of me said,Eye internalized that,Deeper than eye care to share,So eye get lost in my own head,Unable to let you in,Even when you’re waiting at …

Self-Fulfilling

By Mac Guerreiro “Why do eye have to break what eye love so much?”That lyric plays over and over,Because you’re right,Eye’ve been pushing and pushing,Towards a self-fulfilling prophecy,Determined to be too much,Till everything proves eye am,Till he’s reduced to sand,Today eye was faced with it,The valid question,“Do eye want to inflict suffering?”Parts of me answered …

Stop

By Mac Guerreiro Eye can’t stop,The tears,The sobs,None of it,My head hurts,My heart too,Eye don’t know what to do,Eye wish it would stop,The pain,The hollow feeling,The projector in my brain,Eye bet she loved having you,Taking you away from me,Eye bet she felt like a real queen,Not that eye blame her,Eye wish it would stop,The darkness …

Words

By Mac Guerreiro What was eye supposed to say?No,Don’t,Please head my way?Eye didn’t feel that was okay,But when eye thought of a delay,Eye didn’t anticipate two hours plus,And normally eye wouldn’t care,But eye really wanted you here,To hold and rub me like you said,Eye don’t have words,Just shitty thoughts inside my head.

Hole

By Mac Guerreiro Everything is fine,So why do eye feel hollow inside?It hurts,And sleep feels a lifetime away,Eye was looking forward to ending this day,No such luck,Maybe enough encouragement and my eyes will shut,Maybe if tears flow the heaviness will wain,How can an empty hole hold so much pain?

Why?

By Mac Guerreiro Eye know you didn’t say it for me,That you were just expressing,In a perfect world,If eye were a perfect girl,Eye wouldn’t be phased,Eye’d recognize how eye can only grow at my own pace,And that fucking up is okay,But eye don’t live in that reality,The one eye live in is more shaky,Eye’m working …

Mother

By Mac Guerreiro It was brief and meaningful,Our nighttime encounters often are,And as eye ran towards her,Eye was faced with the first time,Another life,Eons ago,One eye feel daily yet may never know,She cleansed my vessel,And sent me on my way,My soul and body reunited once again.

Us

By Mac Guerreiro And there we were,The two of us united,Enacting the “Endgame Plan,”Hearing our other team members “assemble,”Forgetting their sibling rivalries,And workin together to “defeat,”Their common enemy,You and me,The moment hit my heart,A real possibility,Sometimes eye think on it,You’re wanting to do this,And the feelings are overwhelming,Because eye’ve always known the truth,That eye’ve been …

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